The Role of the Self in Internal Family Systems Therapy
Introduction: Meeting Your True Self
Most of us think of ourselves as a single, unified person. But when you look closer, you may notice inner conflict: one part of you wants to speak up, while another fears rejection. In IFS, we see these as natural “parts” of your system — but behind all the parts lies your Self.
What Is the Self?
The Self is the wise, compassionate center within each person. It isn’t a part — it’s the essence of who you are. In IFS, the Self is described with qualities often called the “8 Cs”: calm, curiosity, clarity, compassion, confidence, courage, creativity, and connectedness.
Why the Self Matters in Therapy
When parts feel overwhelmed, the Self can step in as a steady leader. This allows parts to relax, feel heard, and release the extreme roles they’ve carried. The Self doesn’t judge or criticize — it leads with compassion.
Living from the Self
When you strengthen your connection to the Self, you:
Respond instead of react.
Feel more grounded, even during stress.
Develop self-compassion rather than self-criticism.
Experience deeper relationships with others.
Closing Thoughts
The Self is always there, even if parts sometimes block it. Therapy helps you access and trust this inner leader so you can live with more peace and purpose.
Call to Action:
If you’d like to explore connecting with your Self through IFS, I’d be honored to guide you. Start here.
Peer-Reviewed References:
Schwartz, R. C. (1995). Internal family systems therapy. Guilford Press.
IFS Institute. (2021). Outcome research on Internal Family Systems therapy. Retrieved from https://ifs-institute.com
Sweezy, M., & Ziskind, E. L. (2013). Internal Family Systems Therapy: New Dimensions. Routledge.